Monthly Archives: September 2007

DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN…?

All the girls had ugly gym uniforms? It took five minutes for the TV warm up? Nearly everyone’s Mom was at home when the kids got home from school? Nobody owned a purebred dog? When a quarter was a decent allowance? You’d reach into a muddy gutter for a penny? Your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces? All your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done every day and wore high heels? You got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking, all for free, every time? And you didn’t pay for air? And, you got trading stamps to boot?

 

Laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box? It was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents? They threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed. . .and they did? When a 57 Chevy was everyone’s dream car…to cruise, peel out, lay rubber or watch submarine races, and people went steady? No one ever asked where the car keys were because they were always in the car, in the ignition, and the doors were never locked? Lying on your back in the grass with your friends and saying things like, “That cloud looks like a ..” and playing baseball with no adults to help kids with the rules of the game? Stuff from the store came without safety caps and hermetic seals because no one had yet tried to poison a perfect stranger?

 

And with all our progress, don’t you just wish, just once, you could slip back in time and savor the slower pace, and share it with the children of today? When being sent to the principal’s office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited the student at home? Basically we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn’t because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc. Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat! But we survived because their love was greater than the threat.

 

Remember these folks? Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, Laurel and Hardy, Howdy Doody and the Peanut Gallery, the Lone Ranger, The Shadow Knows, Nellie Bell, Roy and Dale, Trigger and Buttermilk.

 

How about summers filled with bike rides, baseball games, Hula Hoops, bowling, visits to the pool, and eating Kool-Aid powder with sugar.

 

Didn’t that feel good, just to go back and say, “Yeah, I remember that”?

 

How many of these do you remember? Candy cigarettes. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water inside. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles. Coffee shops with table side jukeboxes. Blackjack, Clove and Teaberry chewing gum. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers. Newsreels before the movie. P.F. Fliers Telephone numbers with a word prefix….(Raymond 4-601). Party lines. Peashooters. 45 RPM records. Green Stamps. Hi-Fi’s. Metal ice cube trays with levers. Mimeograph paper. Beanie and Cecil Roller-skate keys. Cork pop guns. Drive ins. Studebakers. Washtub wringers. The Fuller Brush Man. Reel-To-Reel tape recorders. Tinkertoys. Erector Sets. The Fort Apache Play Set. Lincoln Logs. 15 cent McDonald hamburgers. 5 cent packs of baseball cards – with that awful pink slab of bubble gum. Penny candy. 35 cent a gallon gasoline. Jiffy Pop popcorn.

 

Do you remember a time when… Decisions were made by going “eeny-meeny-miney-moe”? Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, “Do Over!”? “Race issue” meant arguing about who ran the fastest? Catching the fireflies could happily occupy an entire evening? It wasn’t odd to have two or three “Best Friends”? The worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was “cooties”? Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot? A foot of snow was a dream come true? Saturday morning cartoons weren’t 30-minute commercials for action figures? “Ollie-ollie-oxen-free” made perfect sense? Spinning around, getting dizzy, and falling down was cause for giggles? The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team? War was a card game? Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle? Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin? Water balloons were the ultimate weapon? If you can remember most or all of these, then you have lived!!!!!!!

 

Remember that the perfect age is somewhere between old enough to know better and too young to care.

 

Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their “grown-up” life . . .I double-dog-dare-ya!

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We Have a New Convert

We have a new convert to the Harley touring club…  He passed his initiation ride this past weekend, covering 800+ miles through sun and rain, over hill and over dale.  Haven’t figured out his road name yet, but it will come to me in a vision soon.New Convert

For more pictures of the initiation ride go to http://picasaweb.google.com/GQman1/EscalanteBasinRide

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United States Marine Corps #3

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“They told (us) to open up the Embassy, or “we’ll blow you away.” And then they looked up and saw the Marines on the roof with these really big guns, and they said in Somali, “Igaralli ahow,” which means “Excuse me, I didn’t mean it, my mistake.”

 Karen Aquilar, in the U.S. Embassy; Mogadishu, Somalia, 1991

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United States Marine Corps #2

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 “Our Country won’t go on forever, if we stay soft as we are now. There won’t be any AMERICA because some foreign soldier will invade us and take our women and breed a hardier race!”

General Lewis “Chesty” Puller

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So True #2…

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HOW TO WRITE GOOD

 My several years in the word game have learnt me several rules:
1. Avoid alliteration. Always.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They’re old hat.)
4. Employ the vernacular.
5. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
6. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
7. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
8. Contractions aren’t necessary.
9. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
10. One should never generalize.
11. Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: “I hate quotations.  Tell me what you know.”
12. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
13. Don’t be redundant; don’t more use words than necessary; it’s highly
superfluous.
14. Profanity sucks.
15. Be more or less specific.
16. Understatement is always best.
17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20. The passive voice is to be avoided.
21. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
22. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
23. Who needs rhetorical questions?

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So True…

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